Kakashi's Dull Life
by Alterant
Summary: Wandering through a neighboring town and being his perverted self, Kakashi goes through a door that ignites a fire in his dull life he wouldn't ever think possible. Kakanaru.
1. A Little Surprise

So this idea just popped into my head and I had to start it... let me know if you like the premise of the story and I promise Naruto's real personality will be present! Just not when he's working. ;) Review if you have time! I hope to make it very enjoyable in the future!

* * *

Kakashi didn't often wander this part of town by himself, mainly just with a group of friends he very occasionally tagged along with, but he had gotten bored. His Icha Icha had been read an amount of times that probably surpasses any amount any other human had read a series of books in the history of mankind. Plus, he had some free time between missions and he had decided to try new things. Life had gotten… dull.

Though at the beginning the red lights flashing from both sides of the street in a neighboring town seemed just a nuisance, he became slightly intrigued by what they had to offer. Different signs and neon images brought his perverted self to the surface, and enticing scenes bounced around in his head.

He walked into a couple more populated clubs first, earning himself some interested looks from the girls, his mysterious look and capable persona giving him the attention that a lot of the men already there wished they could have received. After spending some money tipping the girls and drinking probably a couple to many drinks, though, he was once again slightly bored, hitting the street again, and looking for one more place to quench his desire for adventure for the next few months.

Instead of trying a more frequented place, though, he roamed a little deeper into the heart of this scandalous town, and came upon a smaller bar which, instead of a neon sign, had a wooden one that dangled just slightly at an angle that made it difficult to read. Tilting his head, Kakashi finally made out 'Heart of Fire'. What an interesting name, he mused. Shrugging and deciding he could handle himself if anything absolutely weird was behind the door, he decided to enter. Slightly dazed and partly sober, not only did the décor and name intrigue him when he did, the atmosphere enticed as well. He looked around to find a tiny bar to the right and a circular stage lit up in the center of the venue. Men and woman sat in the chairs provided, but they looked to be a bit higher class then the others who frequented the more popular places Kakashi had already been to. They had the air of people who came not only to get their rocks off, but to enjoy a performance of some sort, and their sense of anticipation told Kakashi they had been here before and had enjoyed that performance.

Just as he was about to enter and make his way into the crowd, curiosity stirring his soul, a short man whose face was shadowed by a ball cap stepped in front of Kakashi. He was small in stature, but with Kakashi's heightened senses he could tell the man not only was composed entirely of muscle but had a decent amount of chakra built up as well.

"Name?' He said shortly, in a cute voice that would set most people at ease.

Kakashi took a moment to reply, and his hesitation caused the man to shift and place a hand on his hip, almost as if daring him to respond incorrectly.

"Hatake Kakashi." He stated and saw the wheels in the boy's head turn. He had decided the figure in front of him was not much older that one of his students. He took a moment to consider and then his hand went up to scratch his head.

"You're not a regular. What exactly are you here for?"

Kakashi was rather confused at this statement. This was just a normal place of questionable business where bored people like him came to waste a couple hours, right? What kind of question was that.

"It looked... different. I found the other places lacking and wanted to see if this one could keep my interest."

With Kakashi's short answer, the man frowned and seemed to come to a decision.

"Wait here for a second, I will return shortly."

With that Kakashi watched as the man turned and went through a private door to the back. All the while he felt another set of eyes on him from somewhere else in the small space, as if making sure he wasn't up to anything. Kakashi found it curious why the security of the establishment was so tight. What was really taking place here?

* * *

Toshi quickly went to the back, quickly locating his boss and revealing the name of the man out front to him.

"Kakashi, huh?" Toshi was slightly taken aback at the bright smile that suddenly graced his bosses light features. "Let him in."

Toshi bowed and left, not sure what to think about the slight chucking that he heard as he did. He guessed this guest was in for something either truly amazing, or truly horrifying. Deciding he would be in for an interesting night, well, more interesting than normal, Toshi smiled himself as he made his way back.

* * *

Pleased to find the man moved not an inch from where he left him, Toshi thus bowed to the guest and waved him to the floor.

"You may enter."

After that intriguing series of events, Kakashi took a seat at the back and ordered his drink, observing the small crowd and overheard the two men in front of talking about what must be the entertainment.

"I wonder who he'll be tonight." The first man said with a gleam in his eyes that showed true excitement over whatever was about to happen. The other man nodded quickly and spoke with the same enthusiasm.

"I hope it's the blonde again! She's my favorite. Such big breasts… and those eyes! It's like they see everything… and want it. If you know what I mean."

With that the two men laughed and continued their conversation discussing the different… characters? That performed and their favorite attributes of each. Kakashi digested the information and was curious. It seemed as if only one person was talked about, so maybe a single person did performances under different facades? It seemed interesting to say the least, and he was starting to let the excitement of the audience get to him as well, waiting silently and wondering what he was about to witness. He also heard other tidbits about it being a decent amount of time since they've been able to come to the performance. So, it wasn't always offered here? Kaksahi guessed he was lucky to have come at the right time.

It finally started a few minutes later, the lights flickering off, casting the room in utter darkness, before a single beam illuminated the first character who had taken the stage. Busty and ethereal, the girl before him was a goddess. Posed in a suggestive stance, eyes closed, he guessed this was the blonde the guy in front of him had hoped for. She stood still as the audience held their breath, the only movement made when she opened her eyes slowly. At first, only partly open, it was like a gentle breeze rolled over your skin and goosebumps appeared on your arms, but when she finally opened them completely, it was almost as if a fierce, brilliantly blue wave had picked you up and dragged you down into the deepest depths of ocean. Pinning you down and piercing you with their gaze. Kakashi felt his heart stand still along with the others as they patiently waited for her to move. Already, it felt as if the performer had control of the audience, like helpless clay, molding them in the palm of her petite, beautiful hands. What seemed like minutes was actually only a few seconds until she broke the stillness of the room, movements flowing like a swift ocean current, and more enticing than any mortal woman he had ever laid eyes on. She was a fantasy, dressed in a long, silky, transparent dress that seemed glued to her like a second skin, moving on stage like at any moment you could be awaken from reality and she would cease to exist. For this reason, the audience held their breath throughout her entire performance as well, for if it was released she would disappear in a cloud of smoke, never to return.

Her performance seemed to end just as quickly as it began, and when the light dimmed, and she faded, people actually began tearing up. She closed her eyes, posing just as she had at the beginning, and the tiny smile that could be seen gracing her lips was the only hint that she may return in the future. Giving them the slightest bit of hope, but not promising anything, an angel and devil intertwined as one.

The light faded, and darkness overtook the venue once again. Kakashi barely had time to gather his thoughts before a slight popping noise was heard, and then the lights slowly illuminated the stage once again. A smoky veil hid the body on stage, clearing ever so slightly as the figure turned and stood ready to begin anew. Eventually, Kakashi could make out the striking figure of a man this time, blonde as well, with a build that he saw predicted made most people in the audience drool. Muscled, but not exceedingly so, just the right amount of definition that showed he had obtained them through hard labor and training. Smooth, tan skin that begged for fingers to be run over it, to be savored. But even for the urge that overtook the audience to reach out, the dangerous look in his eyes kept those searching hands at bay before they even lifted. He looked like the personification of fire. Like if you touched him you wouldn't be able to avoid scorching your fingers.

The man, for some reason Hatake Kakashi couldn't fathom, looked directly into his eyes the moment the smoke cleared, and he could clearly see the man's face for the first time. Blue eyes again, like the female, but instead of the feeling of intense ocean waves, the feeling of the hottest part of a flame was felt. His eyes bored into Kakashi's, and it was then Kakashi felt the first inkling of familiarity. Whisker marks also grazed the man's handsome face, adding to his predatory persona. He had only seen those marks on one other person… and that person also had the same blonde hair and blue eyes…

Kakashi's musings were brought to an abrupt end when the man started moving. Like the woman, he oozed sexuality, but in a way that Kakashi never thought a man could. His lithe figure flowed with the music, all eyes absorbing every inch of his body, the only part left up to the imagination covered by skintight spandex. Well hell, even that couldn't be totally left up to the imagination because the prominent outline told of something that no one would be disappointed by. Feeling a slight stirring he'd never felt before, Kakashi watched carefully as the man lowered himself off the stage with such grace that the audience gasped. The crowd was silent and appreciative to have a better look as the man made his way through, eyes glued on Kakashi still. As the distance closed between them, it seemed as if the temperature continued to rise, until Kakashi knew he was dripping sweat when the man suddenly reached the back row where he was seated. As the feral scent of the man enveloped him, Kakashi's mind was spinning with emotions he had never felt before in his life. Time seemed to stop as the man dipped his head until his eyes were level with Kakashi's.

"Do you like what you see?" The man said with such a fervent look in his scorching blue eyes that Kakashi gasped and gripped the sides of his chair harder, turning his knuckles white. Kakashi nodded slightly, and the man then showed him a blinding smile that shook him to the core of his existence. Not thinking he could feel a single more ounce of emotion, Kakashi closed his eyes when the man leaned in closer, so he could feel the intense heat of the man's breath on his neck. But it wasn't until the man's next uttered words that Kakashi would learn of true confusion.

"Kakashi-sensei."


	2. A Little Kiss

After completing his goal of thoroughly destroying every ounce of brain function in his sensei's spiky white head, Naruto sashayed back up on stage to finish his show. Throughout the entire thing, he felt Kakashi's questioning eyes trained on him, so he put a little more effort into this specific performance, using all the tricks he'd learned over the years. He had a policy where he didn't stop until he had at least half the audience was dripping blood from their noses. Call it a goal of his.

Ending with a flourish, he smiled brilliantly and bowed, his hard muscles gleaming with sweat. He was thoroughly fatigued, glad this counted as one of his work outs, so he could go home and eat some ramen and sleep. At least, eventually. He may have a few questions to answer after his performance tonight.

As usual, the audience wanted more, but he assured them he would return in a short amount of time with some new material, which more than pleased them. He took one more look at the back where Kakashi was, making eye contact with the seemingly traumatized man once more. Winking, he waved quickly and stepped off the stage.

Walking to the back, when he was safely through the doors he changed back to his usual, nineteen-year-old self, complete with his orange hoodie and black sweat pants. He was glad to be himself again. As he sat, he took the towel Toshi offered him and smiled widely.

"That went great! I mean I didn't intend to let Kakashi know who I was, but I just got caught up in the moment. His reaction was priceless!" Chuckling heartily, Naruto slapped Toshi on the back and cleaned up, gathering his stuff and wondering how his sensei is doing at the moment.

It had been a couple years since he'd starting occasionally putting on these shows, only being able to when he had some free time between missions. It's not like he needed the money, he did it mainly for the fun of it. Being able to hone his sexy jutsu and pass some of his time was worth it. Plus, the people who had regularly came seemed to really enjoy his acts and that made him happy. They didn't judge him for his past, like the people of Konoha who knew his true identity. He could conceal himself here, and instead of looks of hate and resentment, he received the opposite. Looks of fondness and adoration. It was a good change that lightened his heart.

Lost in his merry thoughts, he was brought back into reality by Toshi's cute voice. "Who was that man, if you don't mind me asking, Naruto-kun?"

Standing and ruffling the boy's hair, Naruto smiled. "Oh, just Kakashi-sensei! He's a jonin level shinobi from Konoha. He trained me years ago. We still occasionally work together. He's one of my first good friends."

The way Naruto was smiling and going on, Toshi wondered if sensei was all that Kakashi was to his him. There seemed to be something else Naruto was hiding, if he knew his boss at all like he thought he did. As the man seemed to return to his thoughts, Toshi did so as well.

To be completely honest, if it wasn't for the yellow haired shinobi in front of him, he would still be peddling drugs for one of the most vicious dealers in the area. Or worse, dead. He had been alone from a young age and was swept into the underworld, desperate for a place to fit in. It wasn't until about a year and a half ago Naruto had found him alone and beaten in a back alley, near to death, as he had been short on money in his last exchange and was punished severely. He vaguely remembers that night, but he knows after being delivered to a pink haired woman for healing, Naruto left and came back slightly bloody. As he has never heard from any of his former associates since that night, he knew the shinobi had gone and 'reasoned' with them. And with the blood on his fists Toshi knew they hadn't taken being told what to do very well. But they'd left him alone, and he could never repay Naruto for saving his life. Naruto even got him a side job at Ichiraku helping out part time, and occasionally helping him with jobs like this. Even though he hadn't been trained as a ninja from birth like Naruto and his friends, he knew how to defend himself. Plus, with a few added taijutsu moves learned from Naruto himself, Toshi was pretty capable.

Being jostled out of his thoughts by Naruto standing and stretching, Toshi packed up what little stuff Naruto had brought and held it out to him.

"Thanks, Toshi! Here's your cut from tonight. I can't hang tonight, but I'll catch ya sometime soon! I have some fun business to attend to!" Throwing the bag over his shoulder and hurrying out, Naruto went the back way to avoid any suspicious lurkers who sometimes wanted to be graced with his presence after the show. Even though they didn't know him in this form, he was still rather good looking, if he did say so himself, so he did get unwanted attention. He tried his best to not to make their acquaintance, preferring not to have to kick someone's ass for trying to grab his.

Making his way out, he looped back to the front of the building, expecting Kakashi to be waiting, but his senses didn't pick up the man's presence whatsoever. He looked around just to make sure, but the white-haired man was nowhere to be found.

Naruto shrugged and headed home, guessing seeing your student practically naked and dancing on a pole would be a slight shock to anyone. Man, he had wanted to see Kakashi's bewildered expression one more time tonight. It made him all giddy to think about it. He had saw so much in that one eye, which usually just retained a slightly bored look. It wasn't often that Naruto evoked such emotions out of his sensei. Usually it was just frustration at his normal antics. But not only had he seen the confusion and bewilderment, he had vaguely seen, underneath those, lust. He was used to that look from the people watching his shows, but from his sensei it had been… different. Not at all that bad, actually. He was proud of himself for making such a stoic shinobi show such emotion. Guess Kakashi had enjoyed that character of his, that's for sure. He had to ask him as well if there were any improvements he could make, that was, Naruto chuckled, if the man showed his face around him again.

Kakashi sighed and gazed up at the stars. As soon as Naruto had left his line of vision after his performance, the ninja had sped out of there, leaving the people around him slightly confused at the cloud of dust that suddenly marked his exit.

After wandering a bit, he had ended up on top of the hokage monuments once again. In particular, his old sensei's. He wondered at what the baffled expression on his mentor's handsome face would look like if he had told Minato what he had just witnessed. Kakashi could imagine his sensei's' chuckle at Naruto's antics and a twinge of familiar pain went through his weary heart. He already had failed at most of Naruto's upbringing, but now doing strip teases on the side? What was he going to do about that boy?

He rolled to one side and propped his head up on his hand, sighing. That's all he seemed to do these days, sigh, and think about what he's lost over the years. It was true though, that Naruto had talent. Everything the boy ever does in life, he puts his all into. The previous shows he'd been to were mediocre and unoriginal, that's for sure. Hardly enough anymore to even distract him for an hour or two, his mind always ending up wandering back to his sorrows. But Naruto's had been different. It was intriguing, almost mystifying, one man able to transform himself and be able to drive his crowd insane no matter what persona he was in. Be it man or woman, he knew how to bring out their erotic nature to its fullest potential, sashaying across the stage in a way which rivaled his imagery of some of the characters from his icha icha novels. Which really meant something, because Kakashi had a very vivid imagination. That also had Kakashi wondering how much experience in that stuff Naruto's actually had. In his mind Naruto was still a little, stubborn, rambunctious genin. To think he was getting laid made Kakashi aware of the fact that his small genin had turned into a nineteen-year-old handsome shinobi…

Shaking his head, Kakashi wondered at his train of thought. This was probably the reaction the unpredictable ninja was hoping for. The suggestive wink, the erotic performance, the intense staring. He'd purposely done those things to catch him off guard and bewilder him. Just like the purpose of his sexy jutsu to enemies. That's all Naruto wanted to do. Standing, Kakashi arose from his comfortable position, stretching and chuckling softly to himself. The one thing that comes most in handy, though, that Kakashi thought he had mastered, was holding his reactions in check. Naruto won't get another that easily.

A couple weeks had gone by since Naruto's last performance and he hadn't seen a wink of Kakashi. He had thought for sure the other ninja would seek him out and demand answers, but he hadn't even caught a glance of spiky white hair, let alone had the chance to talk. It piqued Naruto's interest the longer he went without seeing him, though. Usually he saw the other man at least in passing by now, so he wondered what Kakashi was up to. Was he actually avoiding him? He was the only friend that knew of Naruto's side job, now, so he wasn't sure exactly how people would react to him being a stripper. He sure hoped he hadn't disappointed his sensei, if that was the case.

Taking a couple days to think, Naruto decided if he wanted to find out Kakashi's thoughts exactly, he had to investigate himself. So, on one of his days off and on a day he knew Kakashi wasn't on a mission himself, he went out to find the man. He knew Kakashi was superior to him in stealth and sensing ability, so Naruto made took extra care in concealing his chakra and his identity. He chose to be a cute, innocent looking woman with big blue eyes and long brown hair, choosing a civilian identity over a shinobi's, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention. He strolled over to Kakashi's side of town, near his apartment, walking up and down the streets until he faintly sensed the man's familiar chakra leaving the building. Keeping a certain distance between them, Naruto followed, and felt a pang when the man did his daily round to the cemetery, paying a visit to his fallen comrades. It wasn't until the sun started to inch it's way closer to the horizon that Kakashi moved again, taking to the streets of Konoha and seeming to wander for a bit. Naruto almost lost him a couple times, his random gait leading to everywhere and anywhere, until it slightly shifted, and Naruto realized he was heading towards the outside gate. He passed through with a barely noticeable nod to the shinobi standing guard, and Naruto, not wanting to lose the man, did the same. Still concealing his chakra, he let just enough out to quickly switch back to his original self, just long enough to get past the guards.

He followed Kakashi as discreetly as possible and found himself a little while later walking into the town where Naruto performed his acts. He watched as Kakashi seemed to float in and out of the clubs and bars, eye vacant and bored. It seemed as if he were closer to a ghost than a human. Few people even noticed his presence, and the ones who did Naruto gauged as Shinobi as well, out to have a good time before their next mission. But they only acknowledged him slightly, not going out of their way to speak to him.

Naruto decided to spice things up a bit.

Calculating Kakashi's route, Naruto decided to lay in wait at a club a little bit farther up the road. He received some suggestive looks from guys, and a couple girls, along the way, but he brushed them off and continued on his way. He sat at the bar and put a bored look on his face, waiting for Kakashi. When the man finally walked through the door, Naruto was slightly busy fending off one mildly persistent man, but he managed and watched as Kakashi sat a few seats down and ordered a drink from the bartender. He was dressed a bit more casually tonight then his usual Shinobi attire, wearing a nice dress shirt and jeans. Of course, his mask was still on, giving him a mysterious air that kept most of the girls intrigued, but also kept them at bay. Plus his bored air made him seem a bit unfriendly to those who didn't know him personally.

Kakashi didn't make any move to look at him as Naruto approached in his female form, so Naruto make a quick decision to switch to offense. Sitting in the seat beside Kakashi, Naruto crossed his legs seductively and looked under his lashes straight into Kakashi's eye.

"How bout I buy you a drink, Handsome?" He said slowly, almost purring as he dragged his small index finger down the hard line of Kakashi's right forearm. Inside Naruto was laughing hysterically, he never in a million years would have thought he'd use this act on his sensei. But it was fool proof. He'd practiced on multiple men, and he'd have them all eating out of his tiny, womanly hands in a matter of minutes. He was mildly surprised then, when that bored eye turned on him and blinked lazily.

"No, thanks." Kakashi said, and Naruto watched him get up and stroll out. If Naruto had been a real girl, he'd have been fairly hurt right about now!

"Well, then!" Naruto harrumphed, and, getting up, he followed Kakashi out of the bar and ran up to his still wandering gait. He caught up pretty fast, he thought, for the height of the stilettos he was currently wearing. "Hey, I made an effort to come talk to you, cause no one else was going to. Why did you have to be that mean?"

At his words, Kakashi turned his head slightly and Naruto could make out a distantly amused look. "I didn't ask you to come to me. You did that yourself. Don't blame me."

Taking a sharp turn that almost caused Naruto to lose his balance on these death traps, Kakashi took a short cut through an ally. Pretending to pout, Naruto took a couple steps in and put his hands on his hips. "You know, no one will ever be your friend if you act like that."

Naruto didn't have time to process what happened next. In the blink of an eye he was pushed up against the wall of the ally, one of Kakashi's strong hands enveloping both of his tiny wrists, firmly holding him in place. Naruto blinked a few times in shock. His hands were pinned above his head and Kakashi's face was just inches away from his own, his hot breath warming Naruto's face.

"A friend? That's all you want from me? I don't think so. The people who come here aren't looking for friends. They're looking for distractions. People they spend a night with then forget about the next morning." With that, Naruto gasped as Kakashi brought his body closer to his, enveloping him with his scent, and, for whatever reason, Naruto's brain wouldn't seem to function. His eyes were wide and focused directly on Kakashi's, the man's hard gaze seeming to penetrate down to his very soul.

It wasn't until Naruto felt the burning heat of Kakashi's other hand slide slowly up his dress and up his bare thigh, that he was shocked out of his loss for words.

"S-s-stop! What are you doing, Kakashi!" Naruto stuttered, and, finding his strength again, he pushed the man away, causing Kakashi to take a couple steps back and let Naruto regain his bearing on life. He smoothed his dress and stood with his arms crossed and looked in disbelief at the fully amused look on his sensei's face.

"You think I wouldn't know it was you, Naruto? I know you've been following me since the moment I left my apartment. What do you take me for? A clueless ninja like you?" Kakashi shook his head and watched the shock on the young ninjas face turn to annoyance.

"Well, you didn't have to go that far! I mean, jeeze, you could have just told me you knew a lot sooner." As he said that, Naruto had to avert his gaze before his red cheeks gave his embarrassment away. He wished he could have been confident he had felt nothing when Kakashi had been so close, but he wasn't sure he could. He had never reacted that way to anyone else before, so he was just as puzzled as he was flustered.

As Kakashi watched the young man in front of him, he wasn't seeing the form of the young brunette Naruto had changed into to try and fool him. He was picturing this abashed, flushed look on Naruto himself. He had to say, he'd been surprised to find the ninja tailing him, and probably should had lost him when he had the chance. The situation they were in brought certain feelings he would now spend a decent amount of time contemplating again in his free time. The last couple weeks, he hadn't gone a day without thinking about the young shinobi, replaying parts what he had seem in his head, wondering how he'd keep a straight face if Naruto had appeared in front of him. So, he had slightly avoided the Shinobi, keeping his distance if he had felt Naruto's presence, at least until he had come to fully grasp his thoughts about everything.  
"Just a little bit of payback for how you surprised me the last time." Kakashi said with a small smile, patting little brunette Naruto on the shoulder and turning to leave. He hadn't taken one step though when he heard a slight pop, and the real Naruto appeared before him, making Kakashi pause just to take in his brilliant blue eyes and golden hair, which both seemed a bit brighter than Kakashi remembered.

"Before you go, there's something that I really have wanted to see again." Naruto was not going to let Kakashi get the upper hand. If he was going to play dirty, Naruto would just have to stoop that low as well. And he knew one sure fire way to catch this seasoned ninja off guard.

Kakashi didn't have a second to even try to understand Naruto's unpredictable thought process when the man, who was only slightly shorter than him, leaned forward and placed a very light kiss on his mask where his lips would be. Light as a feather and as quick as a bolt of lightning flashing across the sky, it was over. And as the bewildered look that Naruto wanted to see spread across Kakashi's features, Naruto smiled his signature grin and took off, leaving Kakashi in that ally, frozen, to ponder what his life what turned into.


End file.
